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i'm obsessed with the mess that's america
The dead do not poo. 
07.08.09
Doctor Who - Eleven serious
To cure my insomnia, I've put together a Lexx picspam (my first ever, omg) of the first eight episodes. Rather than waffle on at great length about how cool and weird this series is, I thought I'd use pictorial evidence instead! Lexx is just so completely awesome and out there that I feel you guys might want a sample of its many slightly dubious pleasures.

Spoilers for a very early in the series casting change. Not suitable for dial-up. Probably not worksafe either - this show is fucked up.


Kai. Last of the Brunnen-G, a race of warrior-poets. Broody. Incredibly cool, but also a source of lulz. Has unique hair.


Unfortunately, he's captured, has his memories taken and is turned into an undead assassin by His Shadow, the bad guy. It's pretty difficult to tell he's a bad guy, isn't it?


Kai gets his memories back by squashing a brain. There's lots of brain-squashing, eating and stomping in the first four movies.


Not only is Kai undead, he's also indestructible. Fucking nothing can kill him, not even being sawn in half.


Stanley Tweedle. Cowardly janitor and traitor, but oddly loveable. Unlikely hero. Captain of the Lexx.


Zev Bellringer. Transformed into a love slave as punishment for punching her horrible teenage husband-to-be at the altar. Grew up in a box. German accent. In love with Kai. Very cool.


Oh, and she's part Cluster Lizard (more on them later!). Zev does not like Cluster Lizards.


Stan keeps trying to get it on with Zev in some pretty cringe-inducing scenes.


790. Robot head that gets the love slave conditioning meant for Zev and as such falls madly in love with her. Completely horrible little shit but also deeply hilarious.


The Lexx. The most destructive weapon in the two universes. Says "ouch" when it gets hit. Looks like a flying penis. Destroyer of worlds. No, really, it actually blows up planets, which never gets old.

For some reason, the opening four movies managed to rope in some big-name guest stars:


Tim Curry!


Rutger Hauer!


Malcolm McDowell!

I would express more surprise about this, but they've been in a lot of shit haven't they?

Anyway, what else does Lexx have to offer? Well:


Unexpected musical moments!



Surprisingly poignant moments!



Chest biting! Stan deserved it.


Kai: Don't you like it, Zev?
Zev: No!
Kai: I'm surprised. You are part Cluster lizard yourself. I was hoping you would help me think of a name.
Zev: If it comes near me, I'll name it.
Kai: What?
Zev: Squish! Which is exactly what I'll do to it.
Stan: It thinks you're its mother.
Kai: What is it, Squish?


Malcolm McDowell neck-stretching!


Drama!


Whatever the hell this is!


Giant space monsters!



Deeply fucked up bad guys!


Wistful singing!


Incredibly disturbing fantasy sequences! Yes, those are heads.



You don't want to know!


Phallic showers! So phallic that Photobucket disapproved!




Cluster Lizards!

And then things go all Doctor Who...


Zev sacrifices herself for Kai.


This is as sad as an undead assassin with no feelings can look.


But thanks to the ridiculously adorable, carnivorous plant girl Lyekka...


...Zev regenerates into Xev! Same person, same memories, same German accent, slightly kookier and poutier. Still very cool, possibly cooler.

But unfortunately for Stan, there's still no chance of them ever getting it on. Ever.


Stan: I still have some needs.
790: Your life will end in pain.
Xev: Me too, Stan.
Xev: And after what we've just been through, I know exactly what I'm looking for in a man.
Stan: Oh yeah?
Xev: Yes. He needs to be tall...
Stan: (pulls himself up) Yeah...
Xev: Handsome...
Stan: (laughs) Yeah...
Xev: And... dead.

Burn.

Caps courtesy of The Bug Zone.

Comments 
08.08.09 (UTC)
Ahh, the memories! I need to rewatch this show. The DVDs have always seemed a little steep, but I really should bite the bullet and splash out.

Ch5 showed them in a fairly random order, and I only watched a few on-line, so I've never actually watched every episode in the corrct order. I must rectify that.
08.08.09 (UTC)
You can get official region free sets from Australia around about £15 on Amazon Marketplace (I've bought season three and I plan to get two and four in due course), although the season one episodes are apparently edited so it'd probably best tracking down the R2 releases for those.

Why can't channels ever show things in the right order? Apparently Sci-Fi did the same thing in the US, putting all the raunchier episodes together or something to go along with its daft "the sexist sci-fi series on TV" marketing. Ridiculous.
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